Ever have one of those moments when you feel like you’re a great parent? I know we all have the moments when we wonder how much we will spend on counselling for our kids when they get older, but every now and then, you have a moment when you feel like you hit the nail on the head.
I had one of those moments last week! Gracie turned 13 on Friday and for the last 2 years (ever since Jackson turned 13 and went to Bathhurst with Phil for his birthday) Gracie and I have been planning a trip to Melbourne to celebrate her becoming a teenager. She had been saving every single cent she was given for the last 2 years and I so wanted this trip to be memorable…..
The first couple of days were a blast, tramming around the city, shopping, dinners out and a Musical which was out of this world. We were having so much fun and so tired at the end of the day, we fell into bed each night totally exhausted. It was awesome, but something was missing.
The biggest reason for this trip for me was connecting. I realize that as Gracie is getting older, poor old Mum is falling down the rank of whom she wants to spend time with. Now I know this is normal, and I so want her to be normal, but gosh, after being number one for so many years, it’s hard to fall in the rankings! So one of my goals this trip was to have as many”heart to heart” talks with her as I could, to get connected, to get in while there were no others to pull her away from me.
But as the days passed, it seemed like all we were doing was having fun! A friend texted to ask how we were getting on and I explained my feelings to her, and her answer took away all the anxiety I was having over “connecting” with Gracie. She said that as a 13-year-old, this is how Gracie connects…...through fun, silliness and laughter. It was the key for me to “Let go, and let God”
If the whole trip had been about serious heart to hearts, then Gracie would have walked away not having her needs (the needs of a 13-year-old!) met, it would have been all about my needs, and that was not what this trip was about! For her, laughing and having fun is her way of connecting. The moment I let go, and let God do his thing, I relaxed and the rest of the trip was all about building one connection on top of another. And as a bonus God gave me what I needed too, we had an amazing “heart to heart” talk one night after dinner!
On the flight home, Gracie laid her head on my shoulder and as she fell asleep, whispered to me “I love you Mum, you’re the greatest”