Last week I posted a video on social media.
And the minute I posted it, I started doubting myself:
Oh my goodness what have I done?
People from Church will see it.
The kids’ friends will see it.
Other Pastors and their wives will see it.
Those people who I really want to like me will see it.
Those girls who I so badly want to speak into their lives will see it.
Why on earth did I post it!!!
Those voices of doubt and insecurity started screaming in my ear. Those voices that tell me I am not good enough, that I am not worthy, and that I will never be all I wish I could be. The lies of the enemy started to attack who I am and who God has made me to be!
But then Gods voice spoke louder than those of the soul bullies and said to me “Kathy, this is who you are, and I love you for it. I love every single aspect of you, just you be you.”
And with that, I left the video up and carried on with my day!
You see, the thing is, I am who I am! And whether you meet me at Church, at the supermarket or come to my house, I am who I am. I don’t have different personalities for different situations. I am the same person no matter where I am, and so if people are going to judge me for a silly video, then they can’t know me very well!
It has taken a while, but I am ok with who I am! Sure, there are things I would love to change (wouldn’t we all?) but God has created me this way, and so who am I to doubt his craftsmanship? Who am I to try and change or squish who he has made me to be?
Now I know not everyone is going to like me, and again I am ok with that (well, most days I am ok with that!) but I have to be true to myself and who God has called me to be. And if that means I make an egg of myself, I’m ok with that!
I have stopped apologising for who I am.
And so friends, I want you to do the same. Stop apologising for who God has created you to be! Seriously, just STOP IT!
Be you. Be who God has created you to be. Stop apologising that you’re too short, you’re too serious, too conservative, too silly, too shy, too outgoing. Whatever it is you are apologising for…….STOP IT!
God doesn’t make mistakes and therefore you are not a mistake. You were not meant to be anything you are not. Stop looking at the girl next to you or the one on the internet and wishing you were more like her. Embrace who you are. Laugh at yourself. Have some fun. Stop beating yourself up and start accepting who you are, quirks and all! And if people don’t like the real you, then they don’t deserve to be your friend!
Let’s all start to embrace who we are and live life to the fullest, without apologising for who we are!
And for those of you who missed it, here is the video I put up: