Getting My Big Girl Panties On…..

Boy, what a week!

It has been one of those weeks where life just seems to get crazy. Phil was off in India and Indonesia, Tuesday night saw me at the hospital with a friend for over 5 hours, ending with me getting 3 hours of sleep that night! The rest of the week was a combination of being taxi driver, meal maker, house tidy upper’er, sermon writer, assignment finisher, counselor, encourager, cheerleader, sermon preacher, event planner and not to mention, solo parent!

But you know what? I nailed it!
Now, I don’t often blow my own trumpet, in fact, I am the first person to put myself down and point out all my faults, but this week I was awesome! I don’t know what it is with Phil away but I just turn into superwoman! My house is even tidier than usual, meals are planned, washing up to date and my pantry is labeled and all the cans are in even rows! Yep, this week I have been awesome!

To be honest, it could have easily gone in the other direction! Any one of the above could have sent me off the rails, and made me crawl into bed with Netflix and a bag of chippies, never to surface again! If someone had warned me of all the things that would happen last week, I would have said “No way, there is no way I have the capacity to cope with all of that” but the thing is….I did! And I coped with dignity & grace and didn’t even yelled at the kids once!

God has me on a journey at the moment that I am (finally) ready and willing to embrace!

As most of you know, this whole “Pastor’s Wife” thing has been a struggle for me. If I was going to be honest, I have not embraced it and I have fought God a lot over the last year. But a couple of weeks ago something happened. I was in Church like I am every week, but this week God decided that He wanted to speak to me (loudly) during one of the services and I spent the whole service blubbering like a baby. I couldn’t stop the tears, and I don’t think I would have even if I could have. There’s something about humbling yourself and being real in front of your Church family!

God said to me VERY clearly that He has given me grace over the last year, but now, now it is time to get off my butt and lead the women like He has called me to do.

Now, this wasn’t a bad telling off, it was more of a gentle reminder of who He has called me to be!

He said to me “You need to teach my girls how to fight. You know what it’s like to fight for your life, fight for your marriage and to fight for your kids……so teach my girls.”

WOW!

I guess I do know all those things, and I guess I can teach that to other women. Gosh, maybe this “Pastor’s Wife” thing doesn’t need to be as hard as I thought it would be. I can do those things and by golly, I will do them the best that I can.

And so as I head into this week, it’s another week without Phil, and still, so many things to do. But after last week, this week honestly feels like a walk in the park!