Why Do Our Kids Break Our Hearts?

This week has been an emotional roller coaster for me!
Not only am I stepping out (okay, more like leaping out!) of my comfort zone and have 3 speaking engagements this weekend but Jackson is moving out of home!

Now, I know this is a natural part of life and that is our goal as parents right? To raise our kids well so they will be functioning adults! To live independently and be a good member of society. So why is this Mamma’s heart hurting so much?

I knew it was eventually going to happen, and God in His wisdom has been preparing me for a while, but every now and then I find myself close to tears or sitting in his room for no apparent reason!

He is so ready for this and is the most excited I have seen him for a while, so I am trying my hardest not to be the sappy old Mum who is sitting in the corner, tears streaming down her face, going through all his baby photo’s saying “I don’t know how this happened, where did all those years ago?”

So many stories and memories are flooding my mind.
I know I sound like an overdramatic Mother but it’s hard when one of your babies flies the coop! When life as you know it, will no longer be the same. And when someone you have lived with for 20 years is no longer under the same roof as you!

I know I will be fine. Many, many mothers have walked this path before, and as far as I know, none of them have died of a broken heart!

So I am trying to focus on the positives this week! No more shoes left at the front door. I will never have to buy cans of tuna ever again. There will be fewer groceries in the weekly shop and I won’t have to wash any more stinky socks….okay I’ll still have Phils, but for some reason, his are never as bad as Jacksons!

Tonight the four of us are sitting down to have a farewell dinner. There are no surprises that we are having butter chicken, I mean what else would we have as a farewell meal for Jackson?
I am sure I will shed a few tears as we reminisce and look forward to the exciting times to come.

So without getting too sentimental, here are a few words as he heads off into the big wide world:

Dear Son,
I am so proud of you.
Since before you were born, I have loved you with a fierce love that only a Mamma can understand. I have always prayed for you and will continue to do so, just because you are leaving home the prayers won’t stop! It doesn’t matter how old you get, you will always be in my heart and prayers!
I think you have been the easiest kid in the world to raise. I have never had to ground you, and the threat of no dessert was always enough to bring you back into line.
You were and still are a kid of few words, but the ones you speak are meaningful and to the point.
Your gentle spirit and your deep conviction for what you believe will take you far in life. Your generosity and loyalty are to be greatly admired and I know your work ethic, along with your entrepreneurial skills will help you achieve anything you set your mind to.
It was obvious from a young age that you are incredibly like your Dad. He is an amazing man so if you turn out anything like him, you will be doing well.

So Buddy, as you pack up your worldly belongings and head off into the beautiful unknown I pray that you would walk the path God has for you. Remember to be kind to everyone you meet, and please come back and visit your old Mamma regularly.

Thank you for being an incredible son and for making my job as a Mamma so jolly easy.
Go, be brave and conquer the world Son.

Love
Mother
xxx