When Healing and Life Collide.

Monday was a turning point for me.
The retreat is 12 days. They do this as they know this is the optimal amount of time that is needed. They are wise people.

If I had left after a week, I would have cried all my tears, but the healing would not have had time to take root. The healing that was so desperately needed would have been pushed aside as I entered back into the real world and the busyness of life would have enveloped me and pushed the healing aside for another time…..or never at all!

As I read a book I had brought with me (I will write about that in a later blog!) the tears started again. But these were not tears of hurt and anguish like the first week, these were healing tears.

The tears from the first week were cold, wet and heavy. But these tears were warm healing tears that left my cheeks glowing instead of washing me out. These tears were a balm for my face and a release for my soul. These tears were beautiful, and I knew God was collecting these in a different jar than the others.

I was so worried that I would go to the retreat and all I would do is watch Netflix and play on my phone, and it would have been okay if I had done that. But I didn’t. I didn’t want to!

That second week I could not get enough of God and His word. I sat there with my highlighter, highlighting passage after passage of scripture. Flicking and turning where God led me. Scripture after Scripture of how loved I am, how I am chosen and highly favored. How I am a daughter of the Most-High King, how I am brave and beautiful and handpicked by Him!

How incredibly gracious of God to let me pour out all my woes to Him for a week, for Him to listen, and then fill me with his unconditional love! There was no condemnation of how I had been disobedient. Of how I had let sin in my life and how I had listened to the lies of the enemy. Nothing but grace upon grace, and soon those tears of healing turned to tears of thankfulness.

Thankful that during this hard season God has never left me. Thankful that he will turn this season of disappointments into one of triumph. That all those tears He collected will not be wasted. Thankful for the lessons He has so graciously taught me, and oh so thankful for unconditional love.

And so as I head back into the real world, it is my prayer that I will remember this time that was so graciously given to me. I will remember the opportunity that was given to me to heal and grow stronger. To be able to face things that previously would have taken me out. To be thankful for this time and this season. But the greatest thing for me (and you) to remember, is the sacrifice Jesus paid. The sacrifice he paid so that I could live this beautiful life.

And for that, I will be eternally thankful.

Continued on next blog.

Here are part 1, part 2, part 3.